Month: July 2017
The Toddler and Pascal’s Wager
It was a smug, jerk response. I know now that in my heart.
An atheist, Buddhist-leaning friend bemoaned the fact that after leaving his small child with a sitter, the sitter asked him to tell stories about God. It was obvious that the sitter had indoctrinated his child.
My response: it seems your son has taken Pascal’s wager.
Please let this be my public apology to that parent stripped of his personal religious rights. You are quite right to feel violated.
The sitter clearly did overstep bounds by evangelizing your son with her moral values. As you said, you were not prepared to have that conversation with your son.
I agree. It does feel like a violation to leave your child in the care of someone and have them assume that your moral values are incorrect or that you are some sort of failure as a parent because you do not teach your child what should, in the caregiver’s mind, be culturally accepted norms and moral teachings.
Can we agree then, that no morality should be taught by caregivers at all? No judgement placed on the values taught by parents?
No more caregivers telling kids “it’s ok, let us know if your parents have weapons in the home”. No more “regardless of the teachings of your personal beliefs, this lifestyle is to be accepted and even encouraged.”
Can we all agree then, that caregivers should be restricted to the feeding, safety, and in the case of schools, education of academic subjects?
If it is wrong for a caregiver to impose a teaching of one particular morality, is it not then also wrong for all caregivers to impose a teaching of any morality?
It is time for a frank, public discourse on the topic. A discourse free of judgement of individual beliefs. A discourse merely on the appropriateness of the moral indoctrination of our youth outside the home. I welcome your comments below.
Of Death and Hot Dogs
We never discussed it. Never thought about it. I recall one funeral growing up, but other than that, death wasn’t ever discussed.
It wasn’t taboo. It was simply like it didn’t exist.
Raised by two people who were ambivalent about the existence of God, discussion of the afterlife didn’t occur.
Women’s rights, nuclear proliferation, Reagan’s audacity on political issues… these were hotly debated. Actually, not debated. The home was an echo chamber of leftist thought. Most homes are echo chambers of parental views until teens discover their own ability to defend arguments, so it’s not surprising that my communist and socialist parents held court over a leftist regime.
But, as a mom, I now wonder why death wasn’t a topic? You cannot avoid it forever. People do die in unjustifiably awful ways. Or unfair ways. Or too early or too late.
As my mom is now coming to terms with the fact that she will need ongoing treatment for an illness, we had a discussion about the unfair nature of it.
I asked the crass question “Well, we’re all going to die eventually. How exactly did you think it was going to happen? Not saying you’re going to die of this, but you are going to die eventually. What makes this unfair?”
She didn’t have a vision for death. Didn’t think about it. But whatever it was, it didn’t include this. And about it being unfair, it still had nothing to do with death in her mind. It had to do with treatments and incapacity.
Still no conversation about death. She doesn’t want to think about it.
I don’t get it.
Maybe it’s because I’m Catholic. I love the teachings about death and suffering.
I talk about death all the time with my kids. Not talking about death is what causes people to cling to this life in unnatural ways. As if all we have to live for is life itself.
I’ll admit, the Catholic view of suffering was very foreign to me, having been raised as a Jew. Yet, I am goal oriented. I look not on this life as a test; God is not a giant quizmaster. I look on this life as preparation for the next. Catholicism is pretty darn clear on the goals of life and death.
I think George Lucas got it right in Episode IV. Obi Wan was able to do more good and affect more people when he became one with the force. His life continued in a new way – a New Hope.
So, my kids and I do discuss death frequently. They can tell you exactly what I want at my funeral. I want a parade with trombones. I want a party. I want a celebration of my life. I want people to share funny stories. I want laughter. Even if I’m young when I die. Ok, too late for that. Even if I’m middle aged when I die.
And I want hot dogs served.
I got gipped out of hot dogs when my daughter was born. I had bought frozen meals ahead so my husband wouldn’t have to cook after the home birth. After a few hours of labor, I popped out this gorgeous redhead and he made frozen pigs in a blanket for the toddler boys while I was upstairs nursing the baby.
And they ate them all. Every little pig. Gone.
No hot dogs for momma. The momma who had just birthed a 9lb 4oz redhead. No hot dogs for her. This story has lived on in my family for years. So, I want pigs in a blanket served at my funeral.
Death is a celebration of life and continuation of what is to come. We will forever live in the memories of those in the next generation. If we’re lucky, a generation or two after that.
But our thoughts, our lessons, and our deeds will carry on far longer. It isn’t our “legacy”; it is our ever-living essence.
Suffering and death simply help shape who our person, what our essence, is at the time of our death.
My essence will be generations of redheads who love pigs in a blanket.
The Unholy Church of America
It holds all the tradition of any church.
- Members who donate money generously – both individuals and corporations
- Volunteers who zealously donate their time
- The sacrament of confession
- Theologians who clarify the beliefs for the faithful
- A figurehead who teaches the faithful through televised talks and news appearances
- Learned experts who perform their rituals
It is the Church of Planned Parenthood. And like any good church in America, they hold 501c3 tax-exempt status. And believe it or not, as a pro-life person, I support this tax status.
Members who donate money generously – both individuals and corporations
The rallies and local events, such as the Nasty Woman art festival are fantastic ways for members to both get involved in the community and donate their money. A local event was so successful that they raised over $30,000 in 5 hours.
Many corporations and charities also fund the Church of Planned Parenthood.
Volunteers who zealously donate their time
Each week, as they attend “committees and events”, volunteers assist with the Church’s mission – to escort women in to fulfill their declared right – to end the inconvenient truth in their womb. Never mind that to many of these women it may not be an inconvenient truth.
Never mind that it may be a child to be adored under any other circumstance. Never mind that the women may not be aware of the help available to them at this vulnerable time when they may feel betrayed by those they love most – the father of their child, and their family.
No. While the women may be sadly entering the Church, the volunteers are there to take up the battle cry and demand the rights of these women who may be too sad or weak to do so. Resigned to a fate which imposes an emotional burden they may not be later able to handle, they are led into Church in the sure hands of the true believers.
The Sacrament of Confession
Much like Catholic confession, anything disclosed to a clinic volunteer or worker need not be reported to police. Note, not the doctor, but the volunteer.
For instance, if a 40 year old man brings his 15 year old girlfriend in for a rite of the Church, demanding that the living evidence be removed, the workers need not call the police.
It has been said this is to protect the privacy of the patients- that they would be less likely to attend Church safely and speak honestly with their caregiver if they were to fear publication of their conversation.
Theologians who clarify the beliefs for the faithful
You needn’t look far to find the works of learned theologians clarifying the beliefs of the Church. At any women event, be it in entrepreneurship or tech, the assumption is made that all present are members of the Church.
The organizers of such events are quick to assume that as an ovary-endowed-American (OEA), you are automatically an enthusiastic member of the Church. As such, any events whose proceeds monetarily benefit the Church, may be promoted at all OEA events, even if they are not related to Church.
At January’s women’s march, it was assumed that women were members of the Church. As such, women celebrating life were told not to attend the march, as that was a blatant display of blasphemy and not protected by free speech.
“Good” women, “real” women are dutiful members of Church. They donate freely and support the faith. The services provided by the Church must be monetarily supported by non-believers and any talk to the contrary is hate speech against women.
A figurehead who teaches the faithful through televised talks and news appearances
Cecile Richards is a beautiful, well-spoken leader for the Church. Featured on morning talk shows, she expounds on the rites and rights of the Church. The members are entitled to pre-natal care and mammograms. Without these rites of the Church, the members would go without care. The only problem is that most chapels of the Church no longer offer these services.
But no matter, Pope Richards will defend the rights of the members to these services. And I have to agree with her. OEAs do have a right to these services. Where she falls short, is that the services are not and need not be provided by the Church. Plenty of other caregivers offer mammograms and prenatal care, also covered by medicaid, most within a couple of miles of a PP chapel.
Learned experts who perform their rituals
The sacrifices performed in the sacred rituals of the Church of PP, do require advanced learning. Unfortunately, they do not require the generally accepted federal medical oversight. There is safety protocol for the procedures performed in the sanctuary and at the altar of the Church; yet the Church seems to have received a religious exemption. Unlike even an elementary school’s nurse office, the sanctum of the Church is exempt from routine safety inspections.
Full Church privileges
For the reasons listed above, Planned Parenthood should receive an absolute right to continue their 501c3 tax-exempt status. As a non-profit, while they do generate much revenue from their rites and rituals, the money has rightfully been reinvested in the staggeringly high salaries of their leadership. The PPP (Planned Parenthood Pope) makes nearly $1,000,000/year, while the chapel leaders receive an average of $238,000/year.
And, in keeping with the time honored tradition of separation of church and state – their Church should receive not one penny of government money.
Some may point out that the government does give much funding to Catholic Charities for contracted services, similar to the Church of Planned Parenthood. Catholic Charities, however, is greatly restricted and receives tremendous oversight.
In fact, the religious restrictions placed on Catholic Charities in their adoption procedures forced the closing of their services in several states. The result? Kids were placed back in the system and given to already overburdened case workers.
If Planned Parenthood wishes to continue to receive government funding then, like Catholic Charities, they should need to:
- Receive regular medical inspections
- Meet the same medical standards as any care facility performing outpatient surgeries which is not on the grounds of a hospital.
- Receive payment for specific procedures and stop performing others – or have the medicaid funding go to facilities which do not perform those other procedures.
Fly in my coffee 